Goal Setting: Are Your Goals For Your Or Just For Show?

every january, we all suddenly get ambitious amnesia. we forget who we’ve been all year and start writing down goals like we’re about to become a completely different person by february.

suddenly you’re convinced you’re going to be a 5-days-a-week gym girl, post content every morning before work, hit 100k followers in a year, keep a color-coded planner, and somehow never lose your wallet again. (even though it's been missing for three days now.)

then it’s two weeks in, your phone alarm is blaring at 6 a.m., and instead of reaching for your leggings you’re lying there thinking, why did i even put this on my vision board?

if your goals feel more like a cute pinterest board than an actual plan for your life, they’re not going to stick. it’s time to stop making goals just because they “sound good” or because everyone else is doing them.

your goals should feel like they belong to you — personal, meaningful, and actually realistic. and yes, achievable is sexy too. so let’s talk about how to make goals that work for you, not just your instagram grid.

(because if you’re going to romanticize anything this year, let it be your own damn follow-through.)

1. Make It Yours: Your goals should feel like you, not an aesthetic pinterest board of what everyone else is doing.

• start with a full-on brain dump. write down every single goal idea you’ve been daydreaming about (yes, even the one about moving to paris and owning a rooftop herb garden). get it all on paper.

• then ask yourself: why do i even want this? does this align with the woman i’m becoming? would she even care about having this in her life? if the answer is no, toss it and pick something that actually feels aligned with your future self.

• next, picture it. how will your life look when you’ve achieved it? will it make your day-to-day easier, bring you more joy, or help you glow from the inside out? if you can’t clearly see that… it’s not your goal, babe.

• once you’ve visualized your future self and gotten clear on your “why,” update your list. now you’ve got a set of goals that actually belong to you and, the blueprint for becoming the woman you’ve always wanted to be.

2. Start Small, Dream BIG: Think of your goal as a staircase. Every step gets you closer but, if you skip ahead it can make you tumble.

you’ve heard it before, but it’s worth repeating: if you want to run a marathon, you have to train for it. (please don’t try to run one on a whim unless your idea of fun is being carried to the finish line). your goals work the same way! dreaming big is great, but thinking too broadly can leave you stuck at the starting line. that “overwhelm” you feel? that’s just your brain panicking because you didn’t break it down.

say you want to write a book. no, you’re not cranking it out in a day, but over a year? totally doable. suddenly it’s not a wild dream. it’s a realistic plan!

same with fitness goals. if you want to take a 60-minute pilates class but feel nervous about your core strength, start small. do 15-minute sessions at home, slowly ramp up the difficulty, and watch your stamina grow. before you know it, you’ll be walking into that studio like you own the place.

3. Adapt, Don’t Abandon: Sometimes your goal needs to evolve, and that’s just how life is. Adjust the plan, not the dream.

life loves to throw plot twists, so your path might not look exactly how you pictured it. maybe you planned to hit the gym four times a week, but a busy work season knocked you down to once. that doesn’t mean you failed; it just means you need to shift the plan to fit your reality right now. missing a few days (or even a few weeks) isn’t the end of the world. what matters is that you don’t ghost your goals entirely. pick yourself up, tweak the schedule, and keep going.

and let’s be real, sometimes it’s not just about getting back on track, it’s about changing tracks. you know those 3 a.m. pinterest personal rebrand moments where you realize what you wanted three months ago makes zero sense for the person you’re becoming? that’s not flakiness, that’s growth. maybe you thought you wanted to train for a triathlon, but now you’ve realized you’d rather spend that energy building a photography side hustle. the point isn’t to stubbornly cling to the old dream. it’s to pivot toward something that excites you right now.

adapting is a power move. it shows you’re self-aware enough to know when to push harder, and wise enough to know when to change direction. your goals aren’t set in stone; they’re a living, breathing reflection of who you are and where you’re going. so keep adjusting, keep evolving, and trust that the version of you you’re growing into knows what she’s doing.

at the end of the day, your goals should feel like an exciting challenge, not a punishment you resent two weeks in. they’re not here to drain you. they’re here to grow you. so make them yours, start small, and be flexible enough to pivot when life (or your 3 a.m. pinterest board) tells you it’s time. the most important part? keep showing up for yourself, even when it’s messy, even when you’ve slipped. because the woman you’re becoming isn’t built overnight. she’s built in all the tiny, consistent choices you make along the way.

and honestly? she’s going to be worth the work.